About two weeks ago, I started getting antsy because we hadn’t been to Home Depot or Lowes in a while, and I didn’t want the folks there to miss us. (“Hello guy at the HD in Roanoke who works in the bathroom department and who knows us well enough to run when he sees us coming!”) The weather has been too cold lately to work on the kitty room or pretty much anything outside (with a few 24 hour exceptions), so our next project had to be something indoors. It also had to be something fairly cheap since we are still paying off the kitty room supplies (Yay 0% interest!).

Meet our stairway.

On first glance it may not look that bad, but let me point out some of the features of this “rustic” staircase.

1. The walls are painted white. That’s a big demerit point right there.
2. The trim is an unpleasantly-stained pine.
3. The light fixture is one of those cheapo glass cone-like dealies that looks like something Madonna would wear over her bosom. Well, she’d probably wear one over each bosom. We just had one the fixture, though.

Our plan of attack was simple: paint and replace the glass brassiere.

Andy got started with the prep work. He filled in ALL the nail holes in the trim and did some other spackling. He was going to start priming when I happened by.

“Um, Andy. Yeah. That trim is nasty. Is there anything you can do to make it look nicer?”

4. The trim that cuts the stairway in two is all wonky and doesn’t match side-to-side and is just plain ugly. It’s made up of what appears to be bits of wood left over from other projects and puzzle-pieced in.

I believe Andy glared at me at this point. He didn’t see anything really wrong with it and didn’t want to try and change it. I admit we were both afraid of what we would find under the wood if we started pulling pieces off. Knowing the folks who built this house, one of those strips of trim probably held the fabric of space and time together.

I was willing to risk annihilating the universe, though, if it meant bringing a little more symmetry into my life. I like symmetry. Symmetry makes me happy. Plus, if the universe was at risk, perhaps the Doctor would come for a visit.

Andy got out the crowbar and I could tell that for a moment he pondered using it to whack me upside the head, but instead he started ripping off that ghastly trim. Luckily, space and time remained unharmed.

After the painting was done on the walls (the trim isn’t done yet) and before the scaffolding came down, Andy installed our new light fixture.

No, not that one you see in the picture. He spent about two hours getting that one put up, and then I walked by and said, “Um, yeah. That isn’t going to work.” Luckily by this time the crowbar was back in the workshop. Hey, was it my fault that this light perfectly aligned to shine naked bulbs right in my eyeballs as I walked past? The second light only took about an hour to put up, I only heard Andy curse a few times. (P.S. We did not paint the walls yellow. The light in that photo is horrible. We used a color called “river reed.” It’s a pale green with a bit of tan in it.)

Alas, this is where the pictures stop for now. The new trim is in but needs some work (i.e., a few tubes of caulk and a magic wand), and the railing needs to go back up. When all is done I’ll get the final photo in. It looks really nice, though. Trust me. And at around $150 it’s our cheapest project on this house so far.