Freak Show

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Baby bodies are very weird.

There’s the eye thing. Did you know when babies are born their pupils don’t dilate? And their eyes roam all over the place? I’m glad I knew the latter beforehand because otherwise I would have been calling the priest that first day for an exorcisim.

And then there’s the head thing. That weird squishy spot they have and the freaky ridges and bumps. Part of the head weirdness, I guess, is because babies are generally in some state of bald, and most of us aren’t used to spending a lot of time looking at bald heads.

Their mouths are freaky, too. The lack of teeth, though expected, is a bit startling. Especially as it adds to the cavernous appearance of their mouths. Baby mouths are huge. I think you could fit all the rest of the baby’s head in its own mouth.

Inside the mouth is something even more disturbing. The baby tongue. I was always impressed by people who could curl their tongues, but babies have those people beat hands down. Baby tongues undulate. It’s like looking at a tiny, pink stingray in motion.

As weird as these things are, they are all fairly typical (or so I’m told) for a baby. I’m curious, though, how many other babies have a collapsable ear. Anya has one. With a slight bit of pressure, the ear folds neatly in half. Sometimes if she’s been on her side or squished up against something for a while, the ear even stays folded when the pressure is removed. It’s like there’s velcro on there. It would be a neat trick if she could control it…she’d sure show those people bragging about being able to merely wiggle an ear. “Oh you can wiggle your ear, huh? Well, look at this!!”