Today was my fun-and-exciting weekly doctor’s appointment. I brought a book along to read, but this time entertainment was provided by a young couple (maybe 18-20?).
The couple arrived to the main waiting room a bit after I did. I didn’t notice the guy walk over and sit down, but he was already there when the girl bounced over and gleefully told him, “I circled Yes! I asked the lady and I told her, ‘Well, my BOYFRIEND has cats,’ and she told me to circle Yes, so I circled Yes!” The guy didn’t really say anything. I kept reading my book. Then, I heard some rather loud smoochy sounds from their direction. This older guy (60s? 70s?) says something like, “Hey, now. I don’t want to see that!” (In a fun way.) The bouncy girl giggled (teehee!) and said, “Yup, this here is TRUE LOVE you are looking at!” The old guy says, “Nah, this (he gestured to him and his wife) is true love. Fifty years and going strong.” I looked up and his wife was smiling and I smiled at her and we were all thinking, “Kids.”
I was called back to get my doctory fun started and left the two behind. A bit later, I was sitting in one of the smaller waiting rooms when the couple bounced around the corner and took some seats. They had just been to see the doctor and were, I think, waiting to get an ultrasound done to determine date of conception / due date.
As the girl flopped into her seat she gushed, “I can’t believe next time he’s going to put his fingers in me! EW!” The boyfriend just sorta sits there reading something. Then the girl says in a bit of a loud whisper, “I’ve never had that done before!” (Meaning she’s never had a pap or a physical, I think. Maybe she was giving her boyfriend hints for the next time they got it on. Who can say.) There is a bit of a quiet pause as the girl starts reading the pamphlet the doctor gives out on what to do and not do when pregnant. The girl suddently gets all worked up, “They can’t take my hot dogs away!” The guy sorta grunts. “Why, taking hot dogs away from me is like taking cake away from a fat kid! You just can’t do that. It’d be like taking peanut butter away from you!!” Still no words from the guy. The girl keeps reading, “Oh, Phew! I can eat them. See it says here, ‘hot dogs and deli meat must be heated to steaming before eating.’ So, I can eat them, I just have to burn my mouth to do it! YAY!”
I got called on to my next adventure and left them behind for the last time. I would love to have heard what the girl had to say when she got to the ultrasound room — expecting an abdominal scan like they always do on tv — and the ultrasound tech told her to drop her pants for an internal scan. “You’re going to put that thing WHERE?”